as a serial killer my name would be the suspense so my victims would be like “oh no, the suspense is killing me” and we would both laugh right before i killed them
me: *wake up 30 seconds before alarm*
me: *goes back to sleep*
*knocks you out with a calculator* bet you weren’t counting on that
DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP BUT AT THE SAME TIME YOU’RE SCARED OF BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP
A default ring tone is heard. 100 moms look at their purses.